Let me introduce you to Anna.
Anna is in her late 40s, married with two kids, and works full-time while trying to keep up with a social life. Like many of her generation, she grew up with the “always on the latest diet” mindset. It was all about cutting calories and restricting food until that big event—fitting into the perfect dress. Once the event passed, she’d dive into everything she had denied herself.
In her 20s and early 30s, this yo-yo dieting worked. She had less stress, more time, and could hit her goals, then go back to “normal.” But now, in her 40s, that cycle isn’t cutting it anymore. She finds herself stuck.
Her cravings are relentless, her stress is through the roof with work and family demands, and no matter how hard she tries, the weight won’t budge. She dives into a new diet: a banana for breakfast, a small salad for lunch, maybe a tiny dinner or just skipping it altogether. Low sugar, low carbs, low calories—she’s all in.
Then the weekend rolls around. Her husband suggests a Friday night dinner out. “I’ll just get a salad,” she tells herself. But when the menu comes, that burger looks too good to pass up. And when Timmy doesn’t finish his grilled cheese, she thinks, I can’t let that go to waste.
Suddenly, she’s indulging—hungry and drained of willpower. Then the guilt hits. What have I done? I just ruined an entire week of hard work. Frustrated, she decides, Screw it. I might as well have dessert too.
The next morning, it’s pancakes for breakfast, Taco Bell for lunch, and nachos for dinner. She tells herself she’ll start again Monday. And the cycle repeats.
Here’s the thing – she does this EVERY week. She has what she would call a perfect week-day of eating. And then she looses control on the weekend.
If you resonate with this – I want you to step outside of this. On my side of the line. Did she “slip-up” – sure. But was she even set up for success in the first place?
NO.
She was never going to win with this. Anna was starving herself. On many levels. She had this picture of “perfect” in her head – and then when she couldn’t stay there, she just gave up. This is the perfect example of All-Or-Nothing Thinking. People get in this mind-set that if they didn’t stick to the plan 100% then they failed. There’s no room for flexibility – you have to be rigid.
I’m gonna do a few comparisons here, they’re going to sound ridiculous. But bear with me.
Would you quit your job because you were 20 minutes late?
Would you slash all your tires, if only one was flat?
Would you actually burn your house down if there was a spider?
Chances are – you answered no to every single one of these questions.
If you’re like Anna – you’re tired of always being on a diet and never seeing progress. I’m gonna give you 3 tips to help you ditch the all-or-nothing-band-wagon-on-track mentality that is not serving you.
- Be kind to yourself – you are not a screw up. You are not a failure. You are HUMAN. Things are going to go wrong. That’s just life. Especially if it’s not just you. You have other peoples schedules, needs and life things on your plate too. If you planned to have a home-cooked meal, but you had to go to a last-minute parent teacher meeting because Timmy was a little jerk in class and now you only have time to swing through the drive-through – pick the best option you can. Maybe that’s a salad, but sometimes they’re loaded with sugar from the dressings. Maybe it’s a grilled chicken sand-which. Regardless, just try to pick the best option, from the options you have available to you in that moment. And then move forward – 1 taco bell dinner is not going to ruin your progress. Just like 1 salad doesn’t make you a health guru.
- Set realistic goals – I cannot tell you the amount of times i’ve heard people say “my goal is to lose 20 lbs in a 2 weeks by only eating cottage cheese” – okay fine, that’s a little bit of an exaggeration. I’ve only heard that particular one once – BUT i’ve heard the same type of things many times. This is not realistic or sustainable. Instead of trying to shed as many lbs as possible as quick as possible – what if you set a goal of changing your habits. Since your current habits are what got you to where you are – doesn’t it make sense to change the thing that’s not serving you? Vs just constantly being on a roller coaster?
- Allow for flexibility – As i’ve highlighted many times – rigidity does not work. I’m not saying not to plan. Please plan! It will help give you a guideline. But allow for some flexibility. If things didn’t go to plan – that doesn’t mean you messed up or you should throw in the towel – it just means that things didn’t go as planned. Have a back-up plan. Or have things that are good in a pinch. For instance – if you want a quick dinner have things already prepared. I put chicken in a crock-pot and have unseasoned shredded chicken ready to go for almost any meal. You can toss it in a salad, put it on top of pizza to make it higher protein, or throw some seasoning in for shredded chicken tacos ready in less than 10 minutes. Sure, it’s not the grilled chicken with asparagus you had planned. But it’s still a good option.
Once Anna took my advice and started to change her habits – but in a way that allowed for LIFE. She hit her goals, and she’s stayed there. Amazing things can happen when you find your rhythm and what works for you and your life. There’s no one size fit’s all approach – meaning theres no track or wagon to be on or off. Just do your best and make the best choices you can given the circumstances.
And if you need a little guidance – send us a message to see how we can help you reach your goals.
